Time to become a bard

Debbie Phillips’ emphasis on Shakespearean puns in herald Orange’s David Oliver sent from the web: “Don’t forget, Debbie, the slogan in a camping shop window: ‘Here’s the discount on our winter tent’.”

Lane Cove’s Graham Beirman nominated the Nancy Sinatra hit for Unusual Lyrics (C8). These shoes are made for walking’ written by the great Lee Hazlewood and the lines “You keep lying when you should be telling the truth” and “You keep samin” when you should change. As Graham says, “Anything for a good line.”

“How about ‘Drop the Mahout, I’m the Easy Rider’ by Joan Armatrading? Drop the pilot?” offers Angela Robinson of Kenthurst. “A mahout is said to be an elephant herder.”

The whereabouts of the pachydermata, our most recent elephant stir fry (C8), gave Wolf Kempa of Lithgow an occasion to reminisce about his time as a National Soldier with 6RAR in Malaya in 1972. “I remember doing a survival course exercise where we were following instructions to build a trap to impale an elephant against a tree. I can’t remember the answer to my repeated question “Why?” for the life of me.”

“My goal in 80 years (C8) is to still be making music when I’m 80,” says Susan Bradley of Eltham (Vic). “My current orchestral tuba is a bit heavy and awkward to transport, but the sound is excellent. My goal is to be able to wear it for a few more years. I recently had the opportunity to purchase a smaller instrument that was less bulky in sound but lighter in weight. I’m currently blessed with a strong back, but if either that or my knees give out, I’ll downgrade to the smaller instrument and keep honking well into my 80’s.” That’s all well and good, but the question on everyone’s lips is: “Can you play a gavotte on it?”

Count yourself lucky, Maggie Heffernan (C8): “Step aside, Auntie Margaret and Mommy,” explains Holland Park West’s Tony Dennis. “At least you’ve seen a premiership or two with the Tigers. Your favorite nephew/son is yet to see North Sydney Bears being No. 1.”

Alan Watterson of Hastings Point got us thinking: “An article in herald Good Food lists marron and Murray cod as seafood. I think it is unlikely that you would find both in the sea and if so, it would be wise not to eat them.”

Column8@smh.com.au
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