Stimulate your ablutions
Rosemary Seam from Kempsey swears this is a true story and as truth is always stranger than fiction we’ll take her word for it. “Commerce was going well at the popular local Vinnies store when a volunteer collected her suitcase to catch the train to Sydney only to find that colleagues had unpacked it and sold some of her clothes. Luckily most of the items were recovered and the story became a local legend.”
After seeing that you can now buy a toilet advertised as smart, Stan Shepherd from Ingleburn needs answers to the following questions. “Do you have to be a smart ass to use one? Are there crossword puzzles printed on the toilet paper so you can prove you are one? Depending on your state of health and the amount of time you want to spend, should you go for the cryptic or the fast? Can you take an exam if you don’t feel like doing crossword puzzles? Does it have the equivalent of facial recognition technology? If so, and you fail the test, does the message “None will pass” appear?”
Strathfield’s Kerry Kyriacou was concerned to hear that “checks will be phased out by 2030. I won’t be able to use my old excuse for late payments – assuming we’ll still have mail in the 30’s.”
Stephanie Edwards from Roseville has been to several optical stores but hasn’t found one that would accept old glasses for recycling, so she asks, “Do Column 8 readers know of a charity that will take them?” The idea of selling old but expensive frames at the Landfilling is off-putting, especially since many people who are under pressure with the cost of living cannot afford new glasses.”
When asked how to deal with a medium sleeper (C8), Kilaben Bay resident Jennifer Briggs is blunt. “Rough.”
After clearly acknowledging Granny’s penchant for German compound words, Larry Hopgood of Emu Heights asks, “Is there any word, German or otherwise, that has the mysterious disappearance/recovery from illness or injury in the week leading up to the final meeting describes?” the responsible specialist? And no, hypochondriac is not the word I’m looking for.”
North Rocks’ Graham Lum suspects Google is mistaking him for someone else. “Lately when I search for the meaning of a word, Google wants to translate it into Hindi.”
Column8@smh.com.au
No attachments please.
Include name, city and phone number.
