Eat your greenbacks!
“Meals are buffet style at a resort near Kuching in Sarawak, Malaysia,” writes Denise McKeever of Labrador, Qld. “At the entrance there is a scale with a note saying: ‘For each 100 grams of unused food from the buffet, 10 RM (approx. 3 A$) will be charged.’ A clever deterrent!” Better check out the potted plants.
Charles Davies-Scourfield from Culburra Beach has your number. Or is it? “If you omit the starting zero, a mobile phone has potentially 999 million possible numbers. Surely more than that many numbers must have been given out since their inception as millions would be “burner” phones. So why haven’t we run out of numbers?”
“One final word on fashion retro crimes (C8),” asks Mike Fogarty of Weston (ACT). “Smears, please note. Watch out for anyone wearing an RN (USN pea jacket) style officer’s duffle coat last in the CBD. They should be arrested as citizens and gently escorted to the nearest police station, helmsman or medical center, where they can be summarily discouraged from watching endless replays of television The Cruel Sea.”
Glenhaven’s Seppo Ranki says: “Anyone skeptical about the evolution of our language should have paid attention to Fox Sports’ coverage of the Monaco F2 sprint race, when a (British) commentator lavished praise on a competitor, saying he ‘never failed. ‘ be a disappointment’.”
In response to George Manojlovic (C8), Haberfield’s Mark Griffiths states: “A calendar cannot be sold after it has served its time.”
We’re really gonna do this, aren’t we? We’re going to spend most of the week discussing the order of things in the cutlery drawer (C8). “We make cutlery the other way around,” says Ted Richards of Batemans Bay. “From the left, knives, forks and spoons, but also two more sections of kitchen junk like bottle openers, souvenir teaspoons (when were we in Broken Hill?) and those fancy little cake forks that nobody wants to throw away.” Conversely, says Aidan Cuddington of Umina Beach : “I’ve always been (from left) spoon, fork, knife. Imagine my dismay when I came back from vacation to find that our house sitter’s son had insisted on rearranging things alphabetically.” Source horreur!”
“Viv Mackenzie spoons too much: Forget the layout of the cutlery drawer, where do the chopsticks go?” asks Koonorigan’s Suzanne Saunders.
Column8@smh.com.au
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